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— I hesitate to start an essay with definitions as if I could compel you with force of logic to accept conclusions that follow irrefutably from premises. Nor would that be very sexy: an imposition rather than a seduction. Defining terms contributes to the delusion that our disagreements arise from imprecise language, when actually our precision might exclude the erotic heart of the issue: the inchoate, the qualitative, the mysterious. Especially when we are talking about sex, any definition seems to make it less than what it is. Nonetheless: What is sex? The release of normal boundaries to share ones...

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